New “Firsts”

As you have probably noticed, I try to be alert to changes as they occur. Over the past few weeks, I haven’t had to work hard to find them. We’ve had several small, but notable (to me anyway) ones this afternoon. The first occurred as we drove into the garage at home after returning from Panera. I told her that I would be leaving for Rotary and the Y and that Anita would be with her while I was gone. She asked, “Is she the baby sitter?” I said, “Well, I wouldn’t call her that, but she is someone to stay with you while I am gone just in case you need something.”

Up until that moment, I had never referred to Anita or Mary as “sitters.” To me that sounded too much like “baby sitters,” and I didn’t want to offend Kate. Apart from using their names, I just said pretty much what I said above, that Anita (or Mary) is someone to stay with with you.” On a couple of occasions, she has indicated that she liked to have someone with her. I also thought she might be self-conscious about being with them at Panera, but that doesn’t seem to be a problem.

Before leaving for Rotary, Kate said she was tired and asked, “What if I want to rest?” I told her she should feel free to rest. She asked if she should rest on the sofa in the family room or on the bed in our bedroom. I told her should could rest wherever she felt most comfortable. She chose the bedroom. When Anita came in, I explained that she had lost some sleep last night and was resting.

Later, while I was at the Y, I received a call from Anita. She said that Kate had gotten up and seemed confused. Anita thought she might have had a dream because she said something about my mother and was a little teary. This seemed strange as my mother died in 2002. Kate asked about me. Anita thought she might want to speak with me. I asked her to put her on. She asked where I was. I told her I was on the treadmill at the Y. She seemed perfectly fine. I told her I would be home as soon as I finished. We said goodbye, and Anita got back on the phone. She said they were going to Panera.

On the way home, I stopped by Panera and told Anita that I would take her home. When we arrived, she said she wanted to rest. I told her I was going to be in the family room. She decided to rest on the sofa.

I wonder how much of her behavior is related to having lost a lot of sleep last night and how much, if any, is another sign of the changes that are coming our way. I guess I will find that out in the days ahead.