I am always glad to report good news. That is appropriate for last night. After dinner, I suggested that we watch some of Kate’s father’s family movies that I had recently transferred to DVDs. If she were in charge of the Academy awards, they would have won multiple Oscars. She loved seeing films even though they had deteriorated significantly before being transferred to VHS sometime in the 1980s. I always find them interesting myself. Although her grandparents on her father’s side were gone when I joined the family in 1963, I knew most of her aunts and uncles. It is always interesting to see them in their early days with their children whom I also knew. Now almost everyone in the films except for a Kate, her brother, one first cousin, and a few second cousins have passed on.
We watched for more than an hour before going to bed. The movies really brought Kate to life. She was quite talkative even after we were in bed. I was happy that they gave her a sense of connection to her family. As her memories fade, she feels so isolated. She is disconnected from everybody. The movies, like her “Big Sister” photo book restore that family connection even if it isn’t long lasting. I think I will see that we watch more of the films in the future.
In addition to talking about her family, she also talked about our marriage and our relationship. I won’t say anything more about that. I have said it before. Just know that it is something she comes back to regularly. I think some of that occurs because her world is shrinking, and I am becoming an even bigger part of it. I am grateful that she is so appreciative of the things I do for her. I was especially touched the other night when she was so confused. As I was trying to comfort her, she thanked me and said, “You are so kind.” Last night, she took a line from my page when she was talking about what a strong relationship we have. Then she said, “Even if I don’t know your name, I know you. A name is not that important.” Given that she has a hard time remembering things, I was struck by the way she fed back to me what I have told her about not remembering my name. I felt we had had a good day, and we had.
