Addendum to Previous Post: Another Breakthrough

Right after writing my previous post, we added another success to those I mentioned. For the first time since Thanksgiving (seven months), we gave Kate a shower.  Prior to that we had only given her bed baths.

The amazing thing is how well it went. It had been a day of ups and downs. She was awake early and not talkative but relaxed and in a good mood. I spent a good bit of time with her prior to the caregiver’s arrival. The first thing Adrienne does is to ask how Kate is doing. I told her it looked like a good day, but she was a bit slow in getting going.

I left for lunch. When I returned, Kate was in her recliner, but she wasn’t happy. I made an unsuccessful attempt to change that. I decided to do what Adrienne had already done, not bother her for a while. An hour and a half before dinner, I suggested we go out to the balcony. Kate said she didn’t want to go, but I reminded her how much we liked it. Then Adrienne and I took her. She was sullen the entire time.

On Monday, Adrienne and I had talked about the possibility of showering her on Tuesday. When the time came, her mood led me to table those plans. We decided to wait until she was in a better humor. That happened more quickly than either of us could have imagined.

Everything changed at dinner. She almost always enjoys her meals, but she was especially enthusiastic this time. She was on a high. I talked with Adrienne about going ahead with the shower, but I indicated I didn’t want to push her. She agreed.

I walked over to Kate and very calmly told her I thought that she might like to get a shower before getting ready for bed. I was prepared to say a lot more to encourage her, but she responded favorably. Adrienne and I went into action quickly but without rushing her. I changed into my gym shorts and warmed up the water for her. We transferred her from her wheelchair to her shower chair (that had never been used), and into the shower we went.

It went swimmingly well. Kate didn’t make even the slightest protest. At one point, she even lifted her arms, looked at Adrienne and said, “Over here” to get her to spray the water. Everything went well for all three of us. Adrienne and I are eager to try it again. We’re on a roll but not naïve about how quickly moods can change. This particular experience illustrates that beautifully.

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