Although Kate has become very dependent on me, I have made a point of holding back as long as possible on a couple of the most personal aspects of her care, toileting and showering. As of yesterday morning, we broke the barrier with respect to her shower. This was not something I had planned. It came about quite naturally. For months I have walked her to the shower, turned it on, gotten her towel for her and pointed out the soap. Then I let her take over. When she got in yesterday, I noticed that she wasn’t using the soap. I opened the shower door and reminded her to use it. She didn’t understand what I meant. I pointed to it and told her to pick it up. She still didn’t understand what I was trying to tell her. That led me to show her. I put it in my hand and rubbed it on her body. To my surprise, she accepted that willingly, and I ended up bathing her. She didn’t protest at all. Then I used the shower wand to rinse her. She seemed to like that and would point to spots I had missed or that she wanted to be sprayed again. When we finished, I turned off the water and gave her a towel to dry off.
Like other changes, I don’t expect that this means that I will start bathing her all the time. It is a sign, however, that it may not be long before showering is another of the ADLs (activities of daily living) for which I play a more active role .
