Deja Vu

I haven’t mentioned anything about Kate’s deja vu experiences in quite a while, but that does not mean they have gone away. I continue to see the same pattern as always. She will see people in a restaurant, on the street, or just about any other place and say something like, “There he goes again” or “See that woman (couple, family). She’s always there.” She also remembers places we’ve never been before. For example, two weeks ago we stayed in a Courtyard in Buffalo on the way to Chautauqua. She said she remembered some of the surrounding buildings and the room we stayed in although this was our first time there. Two days ago we visited someone we have known here at Panera. He and his wife moved into an assisted living facility while we were in Chautauqua. As we walked down the hall to their apartment, she said she remembered the hallway and the pictures on the wall. On the way back from Nashville a few weeks ago, a couple on a motorcycle passed us. She said she remembered them.

Frequently, Kate does things that I think are both cute and at the same time cause me to feel a little sad. For example, in the past few months she has occasionally taken the cable out of the plug that goes in the wall to take with her to Panera. It is unusual in that she doesn’t often do that much planning. Apart from that, of course, is that the cable will do no good without the plug.

More typically, she just comes into the kitchen and announces that she is ready. I know what she means. She is ready to go to Panera. I don’t really know exactly what motivates her to get ready for Panera. At first, I assumed that she thought we had talked about going there. Now I am beginning to think it relates to the fact that we go back and forth from home to Panera and back again so often. A related factor is that this often occurs right after she has come in from the yard, showered, and dressed. It seems a little like a stimulus/response pattern that has developed. This happened just before we came here about thirty minutes ago. It always occurs when I have gotten into something; so I stop and pack up our things to take to Panera. That is really no problem; it just means that I am regularly shifting gears after getting settled.

The sad part is knowing that her behavior is a direct result of Alzheimer’s, and that it just gets worse all the time. Even as I say this, I feel the need to add that she is usually in a good humor as she is right now. She is happily working on her iPad. Strangely enough, she hasn’t had a problem losing the puzzle because she hit the wrong button. That has been an issue for a while now.

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