Asking Permission

I have noted a number of times that Kate asks permission to do certain things or what she should do. This is becoming a more common occurrence now. It seems, however, to center around the same things. The requests for permission are almost always if it is all right for her to work outside in the yard. This typically happens when we are approaching our house on the way back from Panera, lunch, or dinner. In addition, it includes whether she can use her clippers and which part of the yard she can go to. I still don’t ever recall telling her that she could not work in the yard or a certain part of the yard or not with her clippers. When I give permission, she gives me a look of surprise as though this is a rare occasion. I must admit I play the game myself. I say, “I guess I am in a good mood today” or “I’m really getting lenient.” I suppose this is a replacement for the game we played when she accused me of being “anal” in a teasing sort of way.

One of the other things she does is more understandable. She asks me if she should take her iPad when we go somewhere in the car. She does the same thing for her cup. This is not surprising because we are often going to Panera where she will need these things. Sometimes we are going where she won’t need them.

Less understandable is her asking me if she can use her iPad in the evening while I watch the PBS Newshour. Once again, this is something I have never told her she couldn’t do; so it seems strange that she would ask my permission. My interpretation is that this is just a matter of the transition from her complete independence to a growing dependence on me to tell her what she should do.

Under this same heading I should also note that she is more frequently asking, “What now?” Or “What can I do now?” This happens most often at night when she has come in from the yard. It also happens on days when because of rain or heat, she doesn’t spend as much time in the yard. When she has to spend extra time in the house, she gets bored and asks what she can do. I always take this as a sign that she wants to go to Panera. So far I have been right every time.