This morning I had a long phone conversation about Kate with Scott and Jan. This was a follow up to my conversation with Scott on Wednesday afternoon. They indicated they had suspected something after our April visit. They couldn’t put their fingers on it, but something was different. On Wednesday all they could point to was a slight hesitation in responding to questions. They were very supportive and wanted to know how she responded to our visit. I told them it had been her therapy and mine as well. I also suggested we get together as often as we are able. We decided to get back together after they return from Africa and we return from our cruise in October.
Yesterday at the dentist, I told my dentist. His mother has Alzheimer’s but is further along than Kate. He asked if he could tell his dad (my former dentist) and indicated that he would be glad to talk with me if I were interested. So that brings the number of people who definitely know through me to our pastor, Virginia and Ken, one of the secretaries at church, our children, a couple we met at Chautauqua, my staff, the Greeleys, and my dentist. I also suspect that some or all of Kate’s PEO sisters know.
So how am I feeling about letting the cat out of the bag with more people? I have experienced a little guilt because I feel I have betrayed Kate. On the other hand, it has been a relief to me to share this secret that I have been holding back for so long. My guilt is relieved by the recognition that in the long run Kate will find herself in a situation in which everyone around her knows about her Alzheimer’s, but she doesn’t know they know. What I have feared is that she will learn that I have told someone and that she will be hurt by it.