I woke up at 5:20 yesterday morning and found that Kate was awake. I asked if she would like to go to the bathroom. She did. She wasn’t as confused as she was the day before, but she was a bit uneasy and wanted to hold my hand. I got her back in bed right after 5:30. I thought I would go ahead and get up, but she wanted me to stay with her. I was surprised because she didn’t seem that alarmed. Once I was in bed, she wanted to hold my hand. (That is something she often resisted in the past. Now it seems to be a source of security.) At 6:00, I started to get up, but she wanted me to stay. At 6:20, I told her I was thinking about getting up and getting dressed and would come back and sit in the chair beside the bed. She said that would be all right.
Just as I was finishing breakfast about 7:15, I saw on the video cam that she was about to get up. When I got to her, she said she wanted to go to the bathroom again. Then she spent a little time washing her hands, arms, and face. She got her nightgown wet while washing up, and I got her a dry one and walked her back to bed. After she was in bed, she looked up at me and asked where I was going to be. I asked if she would like me to stay in the room with her. She said she would feel better if I did. We didn’t talk, but she didn’t go back to sleep for a long time. It might have been as late as 8:30. Once she said, “Who are you?” I said, “Richard, and I am your husband.” She didn’t believe we were married. I started to say something more when she said, “Let’s not talk about it.”
Just before 10:30 Kate opened her eyes and smiled. That was a good sign. I thought that would indicate I would have no problem getting her up. That wasn’t the case. She didn’t want to get up. I started a conversation about its being a special day for us. It was the fifty-eighth anniversary of our first date. Of course, she couldn’t remember that, but it did get her attention. Then I mentioned a variety of experiences we had had since then. She was especially interested that we have children and wanted to know a little about them. As she seemed more relaxed, I told her I would like to take her to lunch. She accepted my offer.
Getting up and dressed went smoothly. On the way to the kitchen, I showed her pictures of her grandmother and mother. As always, she was especially touched to see her mother’s photo at the age of nineteen or twenty. She stopped in the family room to admire the poinsettias and look out to the back yard that doesn’t look so beautiful right now. To her, it looks the same even with all the leaves gone. Before entering the kitchen, she stopped to look at a poinsettia that the Robinson’s brought the day of their visit. She stops there each day and comments on how beautiful it is.
The balance of the day went quite well. We ended the day with dinner and a program of favorite Christmas music at Casa Bella. We were grouped at a larger table of eleven, but Kate handled it well. We were seated near the end of the table next to someone we see each time and across from a 91-year-old woman and her caregiver. At one point, Kate was actively engaged in a conversation with the three of them. She was talking about some of the things she used to cook. I don’t know that what she said was true, but she was happy. The program itself was a winner as well.
It is now 8:45 the next morning. She has talked a little in her sleep. Otherwise, I haven’t heard a thing from her and can’t help wondering what she will be like when she gets up. I’m thinking good thoughts but not making any predictions.
