Back to Our Routine

We said goodbye to Kevin and his family night before last, and they left yesterday morning. We were back to a regular routine. That doesn’t mean that everything went the way I would have liked. Once again, Kate had a slow start. It was another morning when she didn’t recognize me as her husband. It seems this is becoming a pattern. When this happens, I don’t try to convince her, I redirect the conversation to something else. This morning I did something I don’t usually do. I said, “Could I ask you a question?” She said, “Yes.” I said, “If you don’t think I am your husband, who do you think I am?” She said, “I don’t know.” I said, “Do you think of me as someone you can trust?” She looked at me, hesitated a moment, and then said, “Yes.” I told her I was glad to hear that and wanted her to count on me for anything she needs.

On the way to lunch, I mentioned that we had met at TCU and that was where we had our first date. That led to a few other recollections of our past together. By the time we got to the restaurant for lunch, she seemed to be herself. I don’t mean that she knew my name or hers, but she seemed comfortable with me and our surroundings including our server.

As soon as we returned home, she wanted to rest. It wasn’t long before our sitter arrived. I gave her an update on the past few days. Then she went back to the bedroom to say hello to Kate. I followed in a few minutes and told her I was going to the Y and would see her later. She was very comfortable with Mary and fine with my leaving. I left with a good feeling.

When I got home, they were watching the last part of Les Miserables. They were both enjoying it. Mary left, and Kate and I watched the last thirty minutes together. She was as engaged as she has ever been. I was happy to see that since the last time I had put it on, she wasn’t as excited. That was the only time she has failed to respond with enthusiasm.

After dinner, I watched the news and then switched to several music videos that I knew Kate would like. She worked on her iPad and didn’t want to stop when I said it was time for us to get ready for bed. She said she wanted to finish the puzzle she was working on before putting on her night gown. I know from experience she can’t remember to stop when she finishes a puzzle. It was thirty minutes later before I told her it was time to get to bed. She didn’t want to stop. I told her I wanted to get to bed myself, but I didn’t want to do that if she wasn’t in bed. She reluctantly agreed to stop.

Once she was ready, she asked if she could work on her puzzles in bed. I told her that would be fine. That turned out to be a mistake. As I tried to get to sleep, she kept talking to me. She would tell me how well she was doing and wanted to show me the completed puzzles. As usual, she also wanted my help completing several of them. Despite the cataract surgery, her Alzheimer’s still affects her vision. Off and on she thinks she has finished a puzzle when one or two pieces are not exactly in place. When that happens, the app won’t indicate that the puzzle is solved. That means she can’t start another one. This continued for about thirty minutes before she called it a night. This was a time that I suspected the amount of sleep she had the night before and her afternoon nap made it hard to go to sleep. I have expected this to happen before, but it hasn’t. I hope this doesn’t signal a new routine.

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