There is no way that I can measure the speed at which Kate’s recent decline in memory has occurred. I only know that she has changed more in the past two months than I can recall for any period since her diagnosis. It is no wonder that she has periodic attacks of anxiety. It’s harder to understand why she hasn’t had more.
Her sense of direction has always been poor, but her difficulty knowing where to go in the house has surprised me. I hadn’t really thought about this before. I guess I assumed she would be on autopilot in the house forever. To some extent, she still is. Yesterday, for example, she said, “Where is the bathroom?” I told her I would show her and walked her toward our bedroom. As we were leaving the family room, she turned and went into the guest bathroom. That is the one she has used most often. She must have recognized where she was the moment she walked out of the family room.
Earlier today at Panera, I asked someone I know at a nearby table to watch her a minute while I went next door to make an appointment for Kate to get her nails done. When I came back, she said, “What’s my name?” I gave her the full name, and she asked me to repeat it.
She got along well yesterday. I don’t mean that her memory was any better. I mean that she isn’t showing any sign of unusual worry or concern over her memory. I sat in the waiting area of the nail salon while she is finishing up. She handled herself well with the person taking care of her. When I left her, there was a brief moment when she seemed to be concerned that I was leaving her. I told her I would be next door at Panera. On the whole, it is still amazing how well she gets along in brief social encounters.
Last night, we went to Casa Bella for Broadway night. We had another good evening, but it was a very challenging one for Kate. We sat at a larger table, and the entire crowd was noisy. There was absolutely no way that she could keep up with the conversation. At first, she tried. That required her asking others or me to repeat things just said. It didn’t take long before she just bowed out of the conversation.
When we got home, she walked to our bedroom without any problem. In a few minutes, I went to the bedroom. No lights were on. She was standing in the middle of the bedroom. She asked where she should go. I told her she could stay right there in the bedroom and that I would get a night gown for her. She went through the usual challenge of getting her clothes off and putting on her gown. Sequencing is a problem for those with dementia. Getting dressed or undressed involves sequencing. Now that I’m watching and helping her dress, I am getting a better understanding of this issue. I am beginning to help by telling her what to do at each step (take off your shoes, your socks, etc.).
