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New Events This Afternoon

Kate continued to rest for quite a while this afternoon. I thought she was just tired. That was correct, but she had another problem with diarrhea. This time the sheets and pad on the bed were soiled. I rinsed them with a little soap and water in the bathroom sink. I felt I also needed to machine wash them. I went to the laundromat to see if it was open today and found that it was and how much it costs for the soap, the washer, and the drier. I came back to the apartment. By this time I had received a call from Jesse who was trying to coordinate on my getting her 2 tickets to Hawaii using my frequent flyer miles. When we finished our conversation, she was to text me on the exact flight information so that I could make the reservations.

I decided to take the bed linens to the laundromat while waiting for Jesse’s text. When I got there, I found it was closed. It looks like we will spend the night on the bed without bed linens. We do have a comforter. In the morning I will see that I get them washed and dried.

When I came back to Kate, she was hungry. I took her to get a sandwich. She ate about two-thirds of it and then started working on her iPad. By this time it was close to 5:25. Thinking that the evening vespers with our preacher of the week started at 5:30, I asked if she would like to go. She wasn’t very enthusiastic, but she said she would. As we walked over to the Hall of Philosophy where it is held, we saw people walking back our way. I asked if they were coming from vespers. They were; so we turned around and headed back to the apartment.

We heard the organ in the amphitheater and saw that the Chautauqua organist was giving a demonstration to a group of children and their parents. We stopped and listened. Then we started back to the apartment once again. Now I felt hungry. We went to the Brick Walk Café where I got a salad. Kate was not at all perky walking toward the Hall of Philosophy or walking back for my dinner or while I was eating. I finished my salad, and we came back to the apartment. She had gotten hot sitting outside at the café. I was pleased to find that it was cooler on our porch, and there was a gentle breeze. Kate started to sit down and then felt she just had to go inside where it is air conditioned. I stayed on the porch. It has been about 45 minutes. I am going to check on her and remind her of the sacred music concert that she had told me she wanted to attend. I think she will enjoy it if she goes, but I am not sure she will go.

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Sunday Afternoon

This is a continuation of the post I started before lunch.

As I was saying, Kate was ready to go and then went back to the bedroom and got into bed. I went in to see if she wanted to rest a little more. She indicated that she did. Once again, she wasn’t in bed too long. We went to lunch. The line at the regular register was so long that we went to the “Grab and Go” line where Kate got a slice of pepperoni pizza. I got the strawberry and walnut salad.

After paying I looked around and Kate had disappeared. I looked in several places and finally found her sitting at a table with the same couple we sat with last night. Kate was not as talkative today. When we finished eating, Kate asked me where the nearest restroom was. I showed her. It turned out that she is having a problem with diarrhea. When she came out, she was quite hot. We came back to the room where she took off her clothes and got into bed. I gave her an anti-diarrheal medication. That was a little over an hour ago. She is still in bed. She seems to be quite tired, but she and I both enjoyed the morning worship service. I am now hoping he will want to go to the evening sacred song service. I don’t want to leave her alone. The good news is that we are close enough that I could sit on our porch where I am listening to a concert performed by one of the military bands. Of course, I would rather be in the audience, but this would be the next best thing.

I am beginning to think about the possibility of coming back here for the last week in August. I think Kate would be up to it. I am certain that next year is out.

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Off To a Good Start

We just returned to our apartment following the Sunday worship service. It reminds me of why we like it here. Tom Becker, the president of Chautauqua, gave his opening welcome and statement about Chautauqua. I told Kate that it could have been the sermon of the day. Kate indicated she would like a copy of his remarks. I had already been thinking about getting a copy. I suspect they will be printed in the Chautauquan Daily tomorrow. In a short presentation he captured everything that draws us here. I hate to think this will be our last visit. I have even begun to think about the possibility of coming back for the last week if we could get a room. The service was capped by a beautiful sermon by our preacher of the week, Father Greg Boyle.

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At Home at Chautauqua

We arrived at Chautauqua yesterday afternoon around 3:00 p.m. We are staying in a new place this year, the Rose Cottage. It is a bit small but works well for us. The location couldn’t be better. We’re about 75 yards from the Amp (Amphitheater) and directly across the street from the Brick Walk Café where I get my coffee each morning along with muffins for both of us.

At dinner at the Brick Walk Café, Kate approached a couple at a table and asked if we could join them. Naturally, they accepted. It turned out to be a great Chautauqua experience. They are very interesting people from New Hampshire. This is their first time here. The husband has had a strong interest in Thomas Edison since he was six. They are here because Edison was married to one of the founders of Chautauqua. His wife is a musician. She taught music in the school system and also plays the piano, organ, and harp.

Our entertainment last night was The Temptations and The Four Tops, both Motown groups from the 50s and 60s. Kate really enjoyed herself despite being hot and the music loud. I believe she is so into performances that these things didn’t matter.

We’ve encountered no problems so far. I have told two of our neighbors and he owners of the Rose Cottage about Kate so that they will be attentive if they observe anything unusual.

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A Very Good Weekend

Saturday morning, Kate and I made our customary trip to Panera where Kate got her blueberry muffin. We were there about an hour before we decided to eat lunch there as well. During lunch, I looked for a movie and found a movie called Me Before You. It hadn’t gotten rave reviews from the critics, but most audience reviewers liked it. We decided to try it. We came home and had a little time for Kate to rest a little. Before 6:00 we went out for pizza. It was just a simple day, but we both commented on what a nice day it had been.

Yesterday was a little fuller. Kate slept later than usual, and I simply relaxed listening to sacred music, checking email, posting a father’s day note about my dad, and reading the paper. The big event was a trip to visit Ellen and our friends the Davises in Nashville.

We reached Ellen’s place about 1:00 and stayed until 3:30. It was a very good visit. In the past, Kate has felt that other people tend to look at me more than at her. I think this occurred yesterday, but I found myself looking at Kate when Ellen would look at me. I think this helped. A couple of times I asked Kate if she would like to tell Ellen something about our trip to Lubbock or something else. In each instance, Kate said, “No, why don’t you tell her.” This has not happened much in the past. I couldn’t help thinking that it represents her awareness that she can’t remember enough to put herself in a spot like that. I don’t think Ellen thought a thing about it. It was done very naturally.

Kate and Ellen had an interesting exchange that didn’t go very far, but I thought it was going to be a little like the conversation that might occur in a support group. Ellen expressed her frustration over not being able to get her brain to come with the right words to say when she is talking. Kate said she had similar problems. They said just a few things back and forth and then moved on. On future visits, I may attempt to encourage this kind of conversation.

This was the first time we had seen Ellen since she had her seizure a month ago. I thought that her speech had worsened since then. On the other hand, I thought her walking had improved. She walked across the room quickly and showed no sign of imbalance. She said she is now using a cane instead of her walker.

From Ellen’s we went to visit Ann and Jeff Davis. Then we went out to eat together. During dinner, Ann and Kate talked to each other quite a bit. That gave Jeff and me time to talk ourselves. I told him that I was happy to see Kate have this time with Ann. We went back to their house after dinner and remained there for about an hour. Once again, there was plenty of time for Kate and Ann to talk. On the way home, Kate commented on what a good visit it had been with both Ellen as well as Ann and Jeff. I wholeheartedly agree. It was a tonic for Kate.

Today we met Evelyn, our decorator, at a tile shop where we picked out the tile and granite counter top for our master bath. Kate told me in advance that she would let me handle things. I told her I wanted to make sure we picked out things that she would like as well. When we got into looking at options and talking about the details, Kate walked around. This is something that she would have been leading if this were ten years ago. Now she seemed as though she were not interested. On the other hand, she did express pleasure on the things we picked out. Tomorrow morning we are meeting Evelyn to pick out the toilet, sinks, and fixtures. Kate did say she would like to go. I am glad, but I suspect that she will not have much to offer. Perhaps I will be wrong.

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Back from Lubbock

We had a smooth trip back home on Wednesday. The only problem we encountered was that Kate left her iPad in the rental car. Unfortunately, we didn’t discover that she didn’t have it until we were already through security and settled in for lunch before our flight. I had what you might call a “false memory” experience. I was sure that I had seen her with it in her hand while we were in the security line. Had I thought about its being left in the car, I would have been less concerned because I would have thought the possibility of getting it back were greater than in the airport. As it turned out, I contacted the TSA at the security check point. They had not seen it. I also spoke with the airport lost and found office. They did not have it either. We got home assuming that we might not get it back. Yesterday morning I got a call from Avis informing me that they had found it. They sent it yesterday for delivery today.

This was a reminder of how important the iPad is to Kate. I was glad that I had mine along. She used it on the trip and continues to use it at home until hers arrives today.

Today is my birthday. Of course, Kate will not be able to remember. I did write it on our daily memo pad that I keep on the island in the kitchen. Every morning I write down all of our obligations including things that I am doing. For example, I write down the time I am going for my walk as well as my time to return, Today is a free day. We don’t have anything on our agenda. I just wrote down. “Richard’s Birthday.” It doesn’t bother me that she doesn’t remember except for its indicating something about the state of her mind. That does sadden me. It is not just that she doesn’t remember. It is when she doesn’t seem to care that is more troublesome for me.

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Going Home

This is a travel day for us. We have had a good time in Lubbock with our son and his family. Though Kate has shown some confusion, she has enjoyed herself. That is what I was hoping for.

This morning after she got up she asked me if it would be all right for her to take a shower in our bathroom. I told her I thought she should just take a shower right here. The she said, “Are they still here?” I said, “We are in Lubbock. We are staying in the Residence Inn, and we are flying back to Knoxville today. She said, “Oh.”

A few minutes later, she asked about her clothes. I gave her a pair of slacks that I had put out last night. Then I opened a drawer and pulled out a top for her to wear. She said, “No wonder I couldn’t find anything. You were hiding it from me.” This was said in a neutral tone. She didn’t appear to be seriously complaining.

She saw me packing her suitcase but didn’t say anything. It was as though this is a normal routine for us. As I indicated in an earlier post when we left Knoxville, this will make things easier for me, but it is sad to see that she is relinquishing things like this. It is a sign of her decline.

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More Evidence of Confusion

We are in our hotel room where I have been checking email, Facebook, and looking at the Alzheimer’s caregivers forum. Kate rested about 30-40 minutes. A few minutes ago she picked up her iPad. She is working on it while still in bed. She said, “I’m glad to rediscover this room.” I said, “You are?” She smiled and said, “With your help.” I didn’t pursue this. She is happy. I didn’t want to confront her with the knowledge that she was imagining she was at home. This is just one more sign of her confusion which is intensifying.

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Observations on Our Trip So Far

We got back from lunch about 30 minutes ago. We were the first people to arrive, and they were not quite ready for us; so we walked around for a 10-15 minutes and then went back. I mention this because Kate is not big on walking. I would not even have suggested it if the rain had not stopped. The humidity was high however, and that bothered Kate.

The menu was only a brunch menu which for me was good. I had Eggs Benedict. Kate is getting more particular about what she eats. I think that is because she has forgotten many of the menu items and ingredients that she used to know and like. We went with the safest thing on the menu for her: shrimp and grits. She had had that last night, but it was very different. I thought it was good. She was not taken with it.

After lunch, we walked up to a square near the hotel where there were lots of kiosks with a variety of art. Some were not open because of the rain. We just did a quick walk through because Kate was getting quite hot. We headed back to the hotel, and she continued to get hotter. She was not enjoying herself.

Before we got back, she asked for a bathroom. We were not too far from a hotel where I took her. She didn’t say, but I was concerned that she might have been experiencing diarrhea. I try to prevent that by giving her 1 tablet of an anti-diarrheal with the nightly medicine. It is hard for me to determine what is just the right amount because it is hard for her to express herself about such things. Diarrhea is a side effect of one of her medications, Aricept.

We have enjoyed our meals as well as the silly comedy show “The Complete History of Asheville for Morons.” I would not recommend it to anyone, but Kate liked it. That is the most important thing.

The pacing of our trip has worked out well. We have had plenty of time for Kate to rest when she has needed to. She has definitely taken advantage of that. I don’t plan to book any other performances unless it is for Tuesday, the day we leave.

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Off to Asheville

Yesterday, when  I returned from my morning walk at 7:45, Kate was about to go outside. It was obvious that she had forgotten about our leaving for Asheville. I told her that we were going to leave at 9:45. She gave me a dirty look but didn’t go outside. She went back to her room to get ready.

At 9:00, she came out and told me she was ready. That was earlier than I had expected and meant that I had to rush to finish up a few things myself. When I packed my things, I also put in some tops and one pair of slacks in my suitcase. As I was gathering things together, she walked into the kitchen with a pair of underwear in her hands. She showed me and told me she had her black underwear.

I went back to her room to get her suitcase. When I picked it up, I noticed that it was very light. I opened it up and found that it was completely empty. All she had was what she was wearing except the black underwear in her hands. She hadn’t packed anything. I quickly gathered up several pair of slacks and tops as well as 3 pair of shoes and 2 sweaters. She came back to the room and asked what I was doing. I told her I had noticed that she hadn’t packed her suitcase and had packed it for her. She said, “Thank you.” She did it very naturally and was genuinely happy that I had done this for her. When we got in the car, I also discovered she had a pair of white underwear in a magazine along with her iPad.

Before leaving for Asheville, we stopped by Panera to get Kate a muffin. Thirty minutes after leaving Panera, we discovered that she had left her iPad there. I called but they didn’t find it. This is the third iPad lost in less than 12 months.

Last night I noticed that she was wearing a robe and an identical robe was on the bed. I said, “It looks like you have two robes.” She said it was a mistake. She meant to bring one gown and one robe but they were packaged like that. She said that was all right. This shows continued confusion. She hadn’t brought any robes. Both robes were in our closet here at the hotel, and she simply got two robes out of the closet.

This morning as I was finishing up in the bathroom, she pushed the door open. She looked quite groggy and didn’t say anything. I asked if she would like to use the bathroom. She said, “I want to take a shower in that shower.” I didn’t understand her, and she repeated it. I understood the second time. The way she said it was very much the way a young child would have said it. I told her I would finish shaving and then turn on the shower for her.

We just finished breakfast. She hasn’t said anything except in response to my questions. The answers have been minimal. She is not typically alert first thing in the morning; so I am not about to draw conclusions. For instance, I am not ready to say that she is disoriented being in a new place although it is a place we have stayed 5-6 times before. I do realize though that she probably does not remember much from those visits.

Kate put the iPad down and looked sleepy. I asked if she would like to go back to the room. She did, and here we are. We have been back in the room for almost an hour. She immediately got into bed. For much of the past hour she has been sleeping soundly as she is at the moment. I will need to wake her up in 15-20 minutes in order for us to get to lunch on time. We have reservations for 11:00. It is now 10:15.