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Mood Changes

The answer is (Do you remember the question? ) “yes.” Kate remembered and came out from her room dressed for dinner. She continued to seem very normal. In fact, I would say her mood was better than normal. She was nothing like she was when I first saw her this morning. She had her top on inside out, something that is very common. I told her about it, and she thanked me. We made our way to Chalupas, our favorite Mexican restaurant, where we sat quietly, enjoyed our meal and just being together. I treasure moments like these and wish they could occur more often. I know that is not possible; so I take special pleasure in each of these experiences and feel grateful that they continue to occur.

On the way home from the restaurant, Kate mentioned that she felt sleepy but didn’t want to go to sleep too early. Once arriving at home, she commented again about being sleepy. I took this immediately as a sign that the symptoms of whatever illness she has had the past few days might be returning. Fortunately, no other symptoms materialized

I suggested that I turn on the “PBS Newshour” in the bedroom while she got ready for bed and worked on her iPad. She mentioned that she would like to stay awake until 8:30. I don’t ever recall her being concerned about going to bed too early. I don’t think I have suggested it. I’m wondering what might have prompted this. At any rate, she put on a night gown and came into the bedroom to work on her iPad in her chair, not in bed. A little later, she indicated she was ready for bed. I pointed out that it was 8:28. She had made it to her own appointed bedtime. We ended the day on a high note.

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Two More Good Days

Yesterday Kevin arrived for his quarterly visit. We met one of his high school friends and her mother for dinner. Afterwards, we went to a concert sponsored by the Knoxville Opera. It featured music from Porgy and Bess and a number of arias from familiar operas as well as several well-known songs from movies or Broadway shows. The included pieces like “I loves you, Porgy,” “Summertime,” “Somewhere over the Rainbow,” “Nessun Dorma,” and “Old Man River.” The singers were outstanding, and Kate was very enthusiastic.

We got to bed late last night; so we got up a little later this morning. I did get up for my walk. When I returned, Kevin got up, and we talked until Kate was up and ready for Panera. That was close to 10:00 a.m. We had some conversation with friends at a nearby table. It turns out that one of them is the mother of a high school friend of Kevin’s

From Panera, we went to church. Before going into the sanctuary, we stood around and chatted with friends. Kevin chatted with our pastor. Kate leaned over to me and asked me the pastor’s name. I told her, and she said, “I knew that.” We walked into the sanctuary and took a seat in one of the pews down front. As we sat down, Kate said, “Now I know where we are.” I asked her where. She said, “First Pres.” The she chucked softly and said, “I saw it on the sign.” She meant the screen at the front of the church that was scrolling upcoming events. We also spoke after the service with some friends we had not seen in a while. When we said goodbye, Kate asked who they were.

We went to lunch and then came back home for about 20 minutes before leaving to see The Hunchback of Notre Dame at one of our local community theaters. There were several very good singers in the large cast. We came back home where Kate worked in the yard for a while. Kevin and I came inside and talked about choices for dinner. We finally decided to go to a local seafood restaurant near downtown. We had a good meal and came back to the house. I put on a CD of Chris Botti. Kevin read a TCU magazine and Kate worked on her iPad. I joined them for a while. It was a pleasant respite after another good day.

As Kate readied herself to go to the room, she asked if she should connect her iPad to the charger. When I got to the room, she was getting into bed with her clothes on. I asked if she would like me to get a night gown. She said she would. When I got back she had taken her slacks off and asked me if she should put them on her chair beside the bed. I told her that would be fine. She said, “I thought so; I just wanted to be sure.” She is increasingly asking what she should do. In fact, she did just that as we got home from the theater. As she loses touch with more things, she looks to me for guidance to make sure she is doing the right thing. These are always things she would never have asked me about in the past.

This is one visit during which Kevin is bound to see more of the changes that Kate is exhibiting. She seems more childlike and less sensitive to the fact that Kevin will interpret her actions as something related to her diagnosis.

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A Very Good Day

When I walked in the house yesterday afternoon, I found Kate and Mary seated in the family room. They were chatting though Kate had her iPad open to a puzzle she had been working on. I could see that they were getting along just fine. That made me happy.

The next step was to see that Kate got ready for dinner and the concert last night. It was then 4:45, and I had made 5:45 reservations at Casa Bella. From there I knew that we still had a long drive to the concert. Kate was in an especially good mood. When I told we would be leaving in 45 minutes, she got right up. She also asked me to get her something to wear while she showered. I did and put the clothes on her bed. She was ready in about 35 minutes. She had actually put on the clothes I had placed on the bed in her room. It wasn’t until later at the restaurant that I noticed that she was not wearing matching shoes, but they were both the same color.

Casa Bella is a restaurant we have frequented for over 40 years. We had our usual veal piccata. I had a glass of wine. We split an order of amoretto bread pudding. We almost always get the amoretto cheese cake, a longtime favorite of ours. Over the past year or two, I have noticed that she is forgetting that it is our favorite and occasionally order something else for a change.

Sitting there was just like old times. I could almost imagine that she didn’t have Alzheimer’s at all. If the evening had ended after dessert, I would have said it was a great day. As it was, the best was yet to come. The program was presented by Gentri, 3 tenors from Salt Lake City. They seem like a very wholesome trio. The theme for the evening was love. All of their songs carried out this theme. They sang a mixture of old and new music, some of which they had written themselves. The group was warmly received by the audience. What was important to me, however, was Kate’s reaction. She loved them. She was very enthusiastic. That is twice in a week that she has enjoyed a live performance, the earlier one was the play, An Act of God, that we saw in Asheville this past Sunday. Gentri closed with an encore of three songs from Les Misérables. It turned out to be a wonderful end to a very good day.

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Travel and Confusion

Today Kate and I drove to Asheville where we have had a very nice day. She has been in a particularly good mood. In addition, she has enjoyed everything we have done today. That includes an especially nice lunch at The Blackbird. We asked for the server who had taken care of us on our previous two visits. She remembered us and once again, remembered our drink orders. Lunch was followed by a play that she liked, An Act of God. I thought the play was well performed, but did not think the play itself was a good one. It isn’t one I would recommend. One of her qualities that has been brought out by Alzheimer’s is to be especially impressed with performers. She almost always overstates their talent. I believe that is what impressed her today. I don’t think she could follow most of what was happening in the play itself. The important thing to me is that she really enjoyed herself. When the play was over, she said, “Wow!”
She has likes the hotel in which we are staying. We have stayed here a number of times. It’s a nice place and in a good location downtown. The woman working the front desk has been with the hotel since they opened and has been at the front desk each time we have arrived. This time she arranged an upgrade to a much larger suite than we usually have. It is certainly something we don’t need, but it is nice that she did this. It keeps us coming back.

In the midst of her enjoyment, Kate has been confused on where we are. As we got to the theater this afternoon, she said something that I can’t remember, but it implied that she thought it was in Knoxville. A little later when we reached the hotel, she asked, “Now tell me where we are.” I told her we were in Asheville. A few minutes later, she asked the name of the hotel. I told her. The second I told her Asheville and the hotel name she said, “Oh, I knew that.” I am sure she did. She just couldn’t call it.

One other moment of confusion occurred just before we went to dinner. She had just brushed her teeth and came back into the bedroom with the toothpaste and two packets of towelettes in her hand as though she were ready to pack up for home.

Right after returning from dinner, she came into the bedroom after brushing her teeth. This time she wasn’t carrying anything. She looked puzzled. I asked if she were looking for her night gown. She didn’t answer. Then she saw that the housekeeper had put a robe on each bed. She said, “Oh, here it is.” Then I got her night gown for her. She has now settled into bed with her iPad. She is very contented, and so am I. She just turned out her light. I think I will get ready to take my shower.

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A Good Day

I always love to report that we have good days even 6 ½ years after Kate’s diagnosis. Of course, I wish that I could report this more often, but that is not realistic given the nature of Alzheimer’s. It is clear that Kate’s mood plays a significant part in making these days happen. From the very start of the day right until this moment, she has simply been in a good mood. We both have enjoyed the day. I have to say it wasn’t that we did anything special. It was that she was happy with everything we did. This reminds me of that of expression that success if not getting what makes you happy but being happy with what you get.

She was up earlier than usual this morning. About 8:30, I went back to the bedroom to see if she were still in bed. I found that she was not only up but dressed and just about ready to go to Panera. We were there before 9:00. She was happy on the way to Panera and throughout the time we were there. One of the people we see there frequently was by himself today and sat at a table across from us. We (he and I) talked for about an hour while Kate worked on her iPad. She never showed any boredom or eagerness to leave. About 10:30, she did indicate that she would like to go home and we did. Just before 11:30, I told her it was time for lunch. She came in right away, and we left for Carla’s where we usually go on Tuesday. From there we drove to the Acura dealer for routine servicing of my car. We were there about an hour and 20 minutes. Again, she was not restless. She simply worked on her iPad while I edited a slide show of photos taken during a 1976 trip to Colombia. We came right home, and she went back outside to work in the yard until I called her in to get ready for dinner.

She ate every bite of her dinner and commented on how good it was. We came home, and she changed into her night clothes and got ready for bed. She was still in a good mood.

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Another Great Day

I am glad to report that Kate had a great day yesterday. I did as well. The greatest pleasure of the day was seeing Kate enjoy herself so much. Here’s what happened.

Last week, we bumped into Marty Lang, a long-time friend whom we met soon after moving to Knoxville in 1971. He is a Methodist minister whose career has been outside a local church. He has been very active in social justice efforts as long as we have known him. His wife died about 2 years ago, and he has been seeing someone else recently. We talked about our getting together as couples. He followed that conversation up with an email inviting us to lunch.

Yesterday we had lunch with them. Kate was apprehensive about going. Although we had just seen Marty last week, I knew she could not remember him except to recognize his name. Neither of us had met his new friend. Having known Marty a long time and also aware that his friend had had a career in christian education, I felt confident that she would enjoy herself.

It turned out I was right. It was an especially good get together. When Marty met us in the restaurant, he was carrying a small potted plant with beautiful yellow flowers for Kate. When Anne joined us, we entered into the typical kind of “get-acquainted” conversation. Anne is very good at asking good questions of those she is with. She also is a good listener. Kate was quite comfortable with this kind of conversation because it involves the kinds of things that she can still remember – family, growing up, dating, etc.

We spent almost two hours with them. There was never a lull in the conversation. When we got in the car to go home, Kate was enthusiastic about our time with them. It was good to see her enjoy herself.

That wasn’t the only good thing about the day. About an hour after we got home, I took her for her monthly facial. Less than an hour after that we were at Casa Bella for Opera Thursday. As usual, we sat with the same two couples. While Kate does not talk a lot, she feels comfortable with them. Equally  important, the singers last night were especially good. It is a very intimate setting, and we were right in front of the singers. What a great way to finish what had already been a great day. I hope we will be able to continue having periodic days that this.

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A Visit with the Davises

Yesterday we had lunch with the Davises in Nashville. I am glad to report that everything went well. We spent about thirty minutes at their home in conversation before going to a restaurant. We got off to a good start when Ann and Kate paired off in their family room and had a conversation just between the two of them while Jeff and I had our own conversation. Ann was good about asking Kate questions that she was able to address even if the information she gave was not right. I couldn’t hear everything because of my own conversation with Jeff, but I did hear Kate say that we are moving to Texas. It is interesting how many things she can’t remember, but she doesn’t seem to forget about that. The good thing is that she doesn’t act as though it is something imminent.

In the car to the restaurant, Kate said something about our housekeeper. Then Ann asked her name. Kate couldn’t remember it. I whispered it in her ear. During the car ride and at the restaurant, it seemed like the conversation was mostly among three of us. Kate didn’t say much. I worried that this might bother her. As we left to see her friend, Ellen, she commented on the way Ann and Jeff are able to put people at ease. They are down-to-earth, not pretentious. This is especially important for Kate to sense because she sees both of them as very bright people and is a little intimidated by them. I hope this keeps up for a while longer.

Our visit to Ellen went well. Ellen had improved somewhat since our last visit just over a month ago. We still had trouble understanding much of what she said. By now I am wondering how much better she is likely to get. It has been two years since her stroke, and she has had 2-3 seizures since February. I plan to continue our visits as long as she and Kate are able.

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A Very Good Day

This is one of those days that demonstrates that someone with Alzheimer’s can have good days. That is exactly what Kate has experienced today. Her mood all day long has been quite good. If it were not for the fact that she still couldn’t remember anything, I would have said she is as normal as she was years ago.

While the whole day was good, it was really late this afternoon and this evening that were the best. I had arranged a phone call with Tina, her cousin in Alaska. Prior to the phone call Kate was pulling leaves outside. When I went out to get her she came right away and was cheerful. In fairness to her, she has been coming in rather quickly most of the time when I call her now. That makes me feel a lot better.

We had a nice phone call with Tina although Kate had gotten hot and sticky and wanted to take a shower; so I finished up the conversation for her. This is the kind of thing she would never have done pre-Alzheimer’s. Yesterday Kevin called. She was on the phone a little while. Then she got in bed to rest.

After Kate had showered she was ready to go eat. There was a threat of rain. When we left it was not raining. Less than a half-mile from the restaurant the bottom dropped out. We sat in front of the restaurant about ten minutes waiting for it to let up. Finally, I remembered that we had some Stouffer’s lasagna in our freezer. I mentioned it to Kate, and we decided to come home. While I heated the lasagna in the microwave, Kate got out plates and napkins and silverware. This was the first time I can recall her taking anything like this kind of initiative in years.

After eating the lasagna, I mentioned that I might have some yogurt for dessert. She got it out for me, took the top off, and put a spoon in it and placed in front of my seat at the island. Again, I haven’t seen anything like this in years.

It was about 7:45 when we finished our yogurt. At 8:00, there was an ETV program on wildlife in Alaska coming on. We watched the entire show together. I mean we both watched without doing anything else. That is the first time I recall doing anything like that in years as well. During the program, Kate was quite talkative, making references to things that were shown on TV. Then when it was over at 9:00, she said good night. It had been a very good day.

One other thing I should mention. We talked about how nice it was to have the lasagna at home. She said, “We should do this more often.” I was wondering when we might transition to eating at home again. Maybe it will be sooner than I had expected.

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Two Good Days

Yesterday and today Kate and I made it to the 10:45 lecture as well as both the 2:00 and 3:30 one. That made for two full days. Kate has been more upbeat and expressed more pleasure at being here than the earlier days this week. I do, however, believe it is time for us to go home. I also find it hard to imagine that we will be back (together).

In three minutes the symphony will play its only concert this week. I am disappointed to miss it, but this time my place is here.

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A Good Day (10:36 pm)

I am writing from our hotel room in Buffalo, NY. We have had a long but leisurely trip from Knoxville. Kate was up early this morning and ready for Panera at 7:30. I had been up since 5:18 and had a walk. I was then taking care of those things that have to be done at the last minute. She wasn’t dressed exactly the way I had intended. I told her I would like for her to change the pants she was wearing. She was quite agreeable,

As it turned out, it worked out well that she was ready so early. That enabled us to get to Panera early and relax before leaving for the airport about 9:50. Our flight left on time. We had a planned layover of three hours in Atlanta. Our flight was delayed fifty minutes waiting on the incoming flight. That meant virtually four hours in the airport. We had nice lunch and then spent the balance of our time on our iPads.

When we arrived in Buffalo, we came directly to the hotel and checked into our room. We got a recommendation of a place to eat from a man at the front desk. We ate at Bravo Cucina. It was a good meal but not great. What made the whole thing special was that Kate was more talkative than I have seen her in a while. She talked about mostly about our marriage. She spoke about how fortunate we have been and how we recognized our good fortune. She also talked about the travel we had done and what a wide variety of travel experiences we had had. She said she was tired and would go right to bed when we got back to the hotel. She was right about that. She is sound asleep right now.

Tomorrow morning we will take it easy. I intend for us to have a light breakfast either here at the hotel or at a Starbucks that is across the parking lot. We are planning to stop for lunch at the Italian Fisherman at Bemus Point on Chautauqua Lake. We have done this each of the past four or five times we have come to Chautauqua.

Kate said several times that we are off to a good start on this trip to Chautauqua. I couldn’t agree more. I hope the balance of the trip goes as well.