It is now 3:45. Earlier in the day, I wondered what the day might be like. I’m happy to report that it has gone very well. Because Kate was up early, we got to Panera for her muffin before having to leaving for my doctor’s office where I donated my bodily fluids in anticipation of my doctor’s appointment on Thursday. We were greeted warmly by our friends at Panera whom we had not seen in a couple of weeks or more. It started with the man who leads a Bible study group for a Baptist church. Then we had a brief chat with a friend who is a member of the group. After that it was a man I have mentioned several times before. He and his wife are part of a group of people from a nearby Catholic church who come regularly after morning mass. He had been asking everybody about us and if we were all right. Then as we walked out, the window washer greeted us and mentioned that people had been wondering where we had been. It was nice to have been missed.
On the way to the doctor’s office, Kate asked me my name multiple times as well as where we were. She didn’t, however, display any sadness over her difficulty remembering. (I am writing this at Barnes & Noble where she just asked my name.) That makes all the difference in the world in how I respond. I can more easily accept the loss of her memory than watching her experience the pain that periodically accompanies it.
From the doctor’s office, we went directly to lunch at Carla’s. Since that was my first opportunity to eat today, I did something I have wanted to do for quite a while. I ordered separate servings of their salted caramel gelato for each of us. (She just asked my name again.) We were both happy. Even more special than the dessert, however, was the time we had together. One time when she asked my name, I decided to remind her of some of the things we had done during our marriage. I started with some memories of Madison, Wisconsin, where I was a graduate student. I mentioned her job as a secretary in the English department, some of our closest friends, and the things we did. (She just asked my name again. This time she tried to repeat it but couldn’t. She asked again and couldn’t repeat it. The third time she got it and repeated it twice.) We spent the rest of our time talking about our experiences. Of course, I did most of the talking, but she had comments to make a long the way. Not being able to recall the details of the things I mentioned severely handicapped her ability to comment, but I was able to jog her memory at least in terms of a good feeling about our past together.
I wasn’t surprised that she was tired at lunch. After all, she had gotten up at least two hours earlier than usual. She said she wanted to take a nap when we got home. After brushing her teeth, she came into the family room and picked up her iPad. She lay down on the sofa. I already had some music playing. In the car, I had played a Willie Nelson album. She has always liked him, and she was particularly taken with his singing “Bridge Over Troubled Water.” I played it. Then I played another version by Don Shirley. She loved that one as well. That led me to try another song performed by different musicians. I selected “What A Wonderful World” by Louis Armstrong. I followed that with two other versions. Then I played the entire the entire album The Don Shirley Point of View.” This one is a personal favorite of mine. I enjoyed it even more knowing that she was enjoying it as much as I. When we came to the end of the album, I asked if she would like to go to Barnes & Noble where we are right now. We’ll be here another 45 minutes. Then we leave for our Tuesday night special at Bonefish Grill. It’s been a good day.
