Ken and Virginia’s Visit

Today is the last day we have with Kate’s brother and his wife. The visit has gone well. We have focused on being together. Except a short drive through the continuing care retirement community that we will be moving to next year, we haven’t done anything special apart from eating out. I was interested in learning more about Ken and Virginia’s move to a similar community this past November. They seem to have adapted well. In their case, it involved a change of cities. They are now closer to family. We have had time for conversation.

I was especially pleased when Kate and Ken had an hour or so to look through a book he had recently given her. It contains a large collection of photos of their hometown of Fort Worth. Virginia and I adjourned to the living room, so we couldn’t hear their conversation. The fact that they spent so much time was a good sign that Kate enjoyed it. This was right after returning home from lunch yesterday. That is a time she normally rests. They finally stopped because she was tired. Ken mentioned that she also began cry as he read and told her about several of the photos. One involved the deaths of a basketball team many years ago.

It helps that Virginia and Ken are sensitive to Kate’s need to rest and have gone back to their hotel an hour or two each day. They understand that she has to work hard to keep up with a group. We have followed our daily routine though she has gotten to bed later at night. I think it is good for her to have a little extra stimulation. I feel very strongly that she and Ken should make the most of this visit. The next one is likely to be very different.

The only concern I have had is maintaining Kate’s involvement in our conversation. Virginia and I are the talkers in the group, and we have dominated. There is a certain inevitability to this. The nature of the conversation has to be rather limited for Kate. I also recognize that she is approaching a time when it won’t be possible for her to join in a conversation no matter what the rest of us do; however, I don’t want her to feel excluded from the group.

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