It is common for people with dementia to experience delusions, hallucinations, dreams, and paranoia. From time to time I have mentioned some of Kate’s experiences with them. They appear to becoming a regular part of our lives.
One of the most common is believing there are other people in the house. I usually discover this when she puts her finger to her lips and very softly says, “Shhhh.” Other times she makes references to “them.” I have never figured out who they are, but sometimes, like yesterday, she explains that they will hear us and “spread the word.” She went on to say how they like to gossip. I told her I didn’t think there was anything bad that anyone might say about her. She thought I was naïve. We were in the car on the way to dinner, and it wasn’t until we got to the restaurant that she was diverted to other things.
When we arrived home, she stopped to look at something on top of the dryer. She put her finger on several places. Then she told me she couldn’t catch them. I didn’t go back to look, but I didn’t see anything as we walked through the laundry room.
Something else is becoming more common. It is the little “thingies” in her hair, around her eyes, and between her toes. Running her fingers between her toes has become as much a focus of attention as pulling her hair. After she was in bed last night, she called my attention to something new. She thought “they” were on various parts of her body. She was trying to rub them off. I asked if they were painful. She said they weren’t. She rubbed her finger across her chest. Then she held her finger up and said, “See.” I told her they were quite small. Fortunately, her concern didn’t last long. I think that coincided with my starting a YouTube video of a Julie Andrews concert. She focused her attention on that. I’ve read about other caregivers using diversion techniques to solve problems like this. I am now grasping the value of that with Kate. Since memory doesn’t last long, redirecting attention often works.
Talking in her dreams is also more frequent. Prior to Alzheimer’s, I don’t recall her having these experiences. They don’t occur with any regularity. They are periodic and there have been a couple of themes. In the early years after her diagnosis, they focused on her classroom and/or library experience. She explained or gave instructions to her students. That disappeared long ago. I take that as a consequence of her loss of those memories.
More recently, her dreams have dealt with young girls or women who live in impoverished circumstances. They include her work with a program to provide education for them or to establish such a program. One of those occurred two nights ago when I got into bed. I thought she was asleep, but she started talking to me about our working together to create a program that would help people in need. I could never figure out exactly what she wanted to do but told her I would help in any way that I could. This conversation lasted fifteen minutes or so. I am pretty sure that she was awake. That makes me think about the difference between hallucinations and dreams. I suppose I would use the term hallucination if it is an experience she has when awake. The same experience while she is awake would be a dream. Whatever the definition, Kate has more of these experiences than she has before.
Most of these experiences do not bother me. The ones that do are those that disturb Kate. The most common type involves other people who might be out to do some harm to her. So far, these experiences have only involved her belief that people are saying or would say bad things about her. As we were about to leave the house last night for dinner, she was frightened by something and held herself close to me. She didn’t want to talk about. Then later while she was brushing her teeth, she insisted I remain right beside her while she brushed her teeth. It wasn’t said in anger, but fear. I wonder what lies ahead.