We had a nice visit with Jesse the past three nights. Kate had a wonderful time. We enjoyed daily mornings at Otherlands where we got a bagel and muffins along with coffee and tea while we worked on our iPads. It is an active place that has a welcoming atmosphere.
We have also eaten two nice meals at lunch. We have always found interesting places to eat in Memphis.
Of course, there are the usual signs of Kate’s AD, but that hasn’t kept us from enjoying ourselves.
Kate and I are in Memphis sitting at a table at Otherlands, a popular coffee shop. She is working a jigsaw puzzle on her iPad. I am checking in on Facebook and email and responding. She just looked up and me and said, “You going to have to take out an ad in the paper saying that “my wife needs a friend.” The loss of close friends is clearly a problem, one I have mentioned before, but this “out-of-the blue” comment illustrates her own feeling about not having anyone she can call a friend – at least one who is in town. I am glad that we were able to have lunch with Ann and Jeff when we passed through Nashville two days ago. It will also be nice to spend a few days with Dorothy and Mitch Hinely this coming weekend. In addition, the time spent with Jesse and her boys has been therapeutic as well. I am thinking about making more of an effort to travel here during the week in the months ahead.
I feel that we may only have as little as a year before it may not make much of a difference; so I should capitalize on the period of time when it matters most to her.
We left Knoxville for Memphis yesterday. We stopped for lunch in Nashville with Ann and Jeff Davis. Early in the conversation, I asked them to tell us about their recent trip to Italy. They had told us a little when Kate said she wanted to tell them about the wedding we are going to this weekend. It is the wedding of a granddaugher of her cousin Tina. It seemed a little abrupt as the Davises had said so little about their trip. I said, “We just finding out about their trip.” She said she thought they were through. I just let her go on with her explanation of the wedding.
When she told the story, it was somewhat disjointed. She first said she had to back up and tell them about her cousin Tina. It was a challenge for her to explain and it took her a while. I helped her with a couple of things. I think she gets frustrated with so much conversation by other people, and she wants to be involved as well. But she doesn’t have as large a set of things she can talk about. A little later in the conversation she said somewhat sternly that she wanted to a chance to say something.
As we left the restaurant, she asked, “What was this place again?” I told her, and she said, “I knew that.” Of course, she really did know that. She simply couldn’t remember what it was until she was reminded of the name.
When we got to Memphis, we went into a McDonalds for something to drink. While I went to the men’s room, she went to a table occupied by a staff member and sat with her. When I got back she was engaging in a conversation with the woman. This is something else that she might not have done years ago.
This morning we spent a couple of hours at Panera. As we were walking out, Kate pointed to a table with 8 college-age women and said, “They sit at that table on the time.” I said, “So you’ve seen them before.” She nodded yes. The interesting thing is that I saw them get out of a van and noticed they were wearing warmup suits. When they came to the table, I saw the the University of Arkansas on the back of their jackets. This was obviously a team that was traveling to or from Arkansas.